Have you committed these fashion crimes?  Lua Farnoush tells you about some of the worst wardrobe malfunctions she’s seen.I truly believe that summer clothing allows for the most self-expression because we’re not forced to cover our chosen attire with jackets and coats.  We can also expose any body art we possess, be they tattoos, piercings or even simply our brightly pedicured toenails.  However, this liberation often leads some to believe that anything goes when, in fact, this is blatantly untrue.  Here are a few of the disturbing ways in which I’ve seen people dare to enrobe themselves.
 
Tie Dye
 
If you’re not “visitin' da island, mon!” then there is absolutely no excuse to even rest a finger on tie dyed material.  It’s never nice to look at.  In fact, it looks cheap and unkempt, like you took one of your grandpa’s old work shirts and went crazy with some leftover paint and bleach from the garage.  I’ve seen a few designers including some dyed headscarves and frocks in their lines, but trust me when I say I flinched at every one of them and only forgave them because of their otherwise consistently brilliant couture.
 
How UGGly
 
I’m repeating myself yet again here.  UGGs are bad enough as winter boots, but they are even worse when worn in hot summer weather.  Case in point:  cute summery tee or tank top, denim shorts and a nice long charm necklace finished off with the offending UGG boot.  I have seen this outfit so many times, yet I can’t seem to bring myself to ignore its grotesque appearance.  Why do people think this looks good?  This is just one of life’s many unsolved mysteries I suppose.  If a pair of UGG boots absolutely must make its home in your closet, at least recognize that it has no place amongst your warm weather wear.  Please stop wearing them; it hurts me.
 
Socks and Sandals
 
Several years ago, I attended Trent University, where this was actually a popular choice in footwear.  Needless to say, if this was the pinnacle of Trentian trendiness, I clearly did not belong there ― good school, bad fashion choices.  Nowadays I’ll occasionally see a senior citizen trudging slowly through the mall in thick gym socks of two different shades of grey and thick-soled orthopedic sandals (complementing their beige elastic-waisted slacks), for which I will only briefly cock my head sideways in apathy.  As far as I’m concerned, if a person can make it to 70 plus years old and have horrible gout and still walk ably around a mall, they can wear whatever the heck they want.

What is unforgivable is when I see a woman wearing pantyhose of clearly not the right shade and the toe seams can be easily seen because she has worn them with high-heeled strappy sandals.  Those are meant to be worn barefoot.  You’re not 70 yet.  No excuses.
 
Accesso-wrong
 
Too many times, I have seen young women wearing large gaudy gold necklaces and earrings that take away from their outfit and make them look like they’re wearing every item in their jewellery box.  Yuck.  If you want to blind people, try a laser pointer; they’re much more discreet.  Also, for those women who are into enamel jewellery, resist the urge to show people that you own both the earrings and the matching necklace by wearing them all together in the same ensemble.  It won’t impress people, they’ll probably just laugh at you.
 
Colour Combos
 
Warm weather practically demands bright colour combinations, but there are rules to doing this correctly.  If you have one piece that is multi-coloured (for example a cute sundress or purse) keep the other parts of your ensemble toned down with simple, solid pieces.  Another rule that should be followed is not to combine more than two solid colours in the same outfit (unless you really know what you’re doing).  Trust me on this one.  I recently spotted an old friend wearing white and red and brown and beige in the same ensemble.  I couldn’t even keep a straight face long enough to greet her.
 
_________________
be easy
 
Often, the fashion mistakes that are the most awful occur when people try too hard to look fashionable.  They’ll put on a bunch of different items that they’d like to show off, they’ll over-accessorize and then walk around like they’re the best thing since sliced bread, but the entire picture is just laughable.  Tone it down, pick one piece (that isn’t too controversial) around which to focus your outfit and quit trying to show off.  Heed this advice; you’ll be glad you did.